“With my family, I’m a communist. With my close friends, I’m a socialist. At the state level of politics, I’m a Democrat. At higher levels, I’m a Republican, and at the federal levels, I’m a Libertarian.”
-Nassim Taleb
My parents are getting old. I’m 19, and they’re 63. Or maybe 57?
To be honest, I have no idea how old my parents are. Once a human passes 50, my brain stops using numbers, and switches to words to describe age: “getting old,” “old,” and finally “elderly.”
The point is… that really sad day is coming. To be clear - everyone’s fine right now. Totally good health, swings a ball and takes those walks like twice a day.
Active, happy. In reality, nothing has changed except my own realization that this won’t last forever. So until then - I’ve decided that it’s time for some family philanthropy. How do I give back to my parents?
What are the simple, low cost, low effort things for me, that would make a big impact for them? Those are the best life trades: “Easy for me, valuable for you.”
Here’s my list of 2 things any kid can do for their parents as they get older. Starting with the lowest cost/effort… going up to high cost/high effort:
I. Low Cost / Low Effort
1. The obvious one == Call Your Mom: I used to feel like “I don’t have time, I’ll call her later” – until I realized that nobody gives a sh*t if I scroll Twitter 10 minutes less per day… but my mom really cares if I call her. Trading 10 minutes of social media for 10 minutes of FaceTime with your parents is possibly the highest +EV trade you can make.
2. Send a pic of what you’re working on: It doesn’t matter if you’re a consultant working on a deck for your stupid client. Send them a screenshot or email saying check it out. You know how when you’re a kid and you draw a squiggle on a paper and show it to your parents and they say OHMAHGOSHH IT’S SO GOOD!! That actually never stops. You can always just show your parents what “you did at school today.”
Watch, I just texted my mom that I’m writing this post. Even if it’s just cleaning up your room, re-arranging your garage, or a random Excel file you’re working on. Just snap a pic of you doing it, and send it to them. This takes zero extra time, but makes them feel included & proud of you.
II. High Effort, but Not High Financial Cost
1. Talk to the “other parent”: Everybody has one parent you get along with better than the other. It’s like being right-handed or left-handed. Do you vibe better with your mom or your dad? The easy thing to do is to lean into the one that’s easy. Maybe they’re easier to talk to, you have more in common, or there’s less family baggage with them. I struggle with this one. I’m really close w/ my mom. Talking to her is like talking to a friend (who just happened to wipe your butt when you were a kid). For me, I have a much more rocky relationship with my dad. I haven’t cracked this nut, but I know the right thing to do is to build a bridge with the ‘other parent’ too. And that, in a nutshell - is why parents are so great. They are the only people on earth who care about you more than you even care about yourself.
So go call your mom today!
CT